Since about a third of our time is spent at the office, it’s not surprising that romance can easily spark between colleagues.
At work, you’re often surrounded by bright, driven people who understand your work stress and worries at the office, so dating a colleague is actually pretty common, says career coach Barbara Pachter.
“[Work] is where people meet a lot of people. It’s either there or online dating,” Pachter, author of the book “The Essentials Of Business Etiquette,” tells Business Insider.
According to a Payscale office romance report, 15% of the 42,000 respondents said they would date someone they work with. And one out of five people who gave romance with a coworker a shot ended up marrying their colleague.
However, there are some basic rules to keep in mind when dating someone you work with. Below, Pachter tells us the most important do’s and don’ts you should follow.
Do follow your company’s policy.
Every organization is different. If you’re interested in a colleague, make sure you know your company’s policy, so that you don’t violate any corporate regulations.
You especially need to be aware if you’re required to come forward with your relationship. The last thing you want is for a love interest to have a negative impact on your career.
We know the old song and dance. Being friends with benefits can either be an awesome arrangement or a ticking time bomb. The question is: do we want to take part? Learn what to expect and know when to bow out. Most of all, lay down the ground rules with your friend right from the start. Do you want to be exclusive? How often can I call you over for Netflix and Chill? Can we binge Star Wars in the order I think is canon or is that too date-ish?
Let’s face it — There’s a lot less drama with your friends compared to with your significant other. It’s easy to be insecure with someone you want to date, which in turn results in tension. With a close friend, you know each other’s quirks and flaws, and you don’t have to keep appearances. Order the burger at that restaurant you love! Fart and blame the other person! Wear those comfy sweats instead of that new scratchy shirt! The rules of dates don’t apply here (within reason, of course).
Ever find yourself dying to approach a beautiful woman you saw somewhere but you didn’t have the slightest clue how to do it — let alone the nerve to even try? If so, I can guarantee you this: Just the thought of trying makes your heart race and palms sweat. But guess what — it doesn’t have to be that way. Here are the top 10 ways to guarantee a successful approach every time.
Plain and simple: Your fear of rejection is your worst enemy — yet it usually just doesn’t happen. The fact is, a beautiful woman won’t scream and run away from you. She won’t point you out to her friends and laugh. She won’t turn into a monster from hell and cut you down.
The truth is, most attractive women will respond somewhere between neutral and positive to being approached because you’re doing something that makes them feel good. It’s flattering, exciting and fun, and for that reason alone you’ll almost never see a woman respond by getting upset, being rude or acting offended. So stop worrying about it, and stop letting fear of rejection ruin your chances before you even try.
As a dude who has been on over 200 double dates, I’d like to think I know a thing or two about the art of the first encounter. A first date should be casual, but not so spontaneous that it seems carelessly unplanned. And a first date should allow partners to chat and get to know one another (so unless you’re a mind reader, save movies and live performances for date number three or four).
Most importantly, with greater risk comes greater reward: the more you’re able to wow a woman on a first date, the stronger your bond with her will be. Of course, work too far outside of your comfort zone, or overshoot your own abilities with a date too complex for you to handle, and you’ll be spending all subsequent evenings with your forearm of preference.
Behold, the best first date ideas from easiest to most difficult.
Let’s face it, when it comes to meeting the next Mr or Ms Right, we could all do with a little help. Here are seven things to keep in mind next time you’re out on a date.
1. Don’t forget your manners
Without getting too Sir Lancelot about things, a little etiquette goes a long way. If she looks nice, tell her that. Maybe open the door as she walks through, or offer your arm as she steps down from the curb – but play it by ear and don’t go too overboard. Also, make sure you remember her eye colour (trust us on this one) and when you’re comfortable, maybe test the waters by leaning in a little closer as she speaks – if she backs away, well, it’s probably not going well.
Launch the gallery to read about and view more of our seven dating tips for men.
Real talk: Dating is sometimes harder than it should be. After countless dinners and drinks, it can be tempting to throw in the towel and resign to nights of forever watching Netflix alone in your bed. But when dating is done right, it can be amazing, and those great dates often lead to great relationships. So consider this your dating playbook, with all the information you need to survive the first date and make sure there’s a second one.
Sure, you might meet the love of your life while sipping gin and tonics, but wouldn’t it be so much cooler to say you met at a mud run? You never know where you’re going to meet the next person you date, so if you’re only looking in one spot (like that bar where you’re a regular) then you’re missing out on tons of possible partners. We know plenty of couples who have met while standing in line at the grocery store, a Target parking lot, even a naked reality show. The takeaway? Love can crop up anywhere, so get out there and keep your eyes open.
If you’re single and dating, you may be surprised to learn that the dating pool is actually quite deep, even if it doesn’t always feel that way. There are more than 100 million unmarried American adults — which is more than 45 percent of all adults in the U.S. — but not all of them are unattached [source: U.S. Census Bureau]. Roughly 5 percent cohabitate with a partner, effectively kicking them out of the pool. But what we can take away from this is that there are many single Americans, and a good percentage of them are swimming around looking for a date.
While the dating scene may seem like a lot of work to one person, to another, it’s a fun way to meet other people. But all things being equal, first dates can make most of us anxious. It’s Just Lunch, a dating service for single professionals, surveyed single American adults and found that nearly 70 percent of men and about 50 percent of women won’t bother with a second date if the chemistry isn’t there. When there is chemistry, though, 97 percent of men will call to ask out their love interest again — in 72 hours or less [source: Search Your Love].
Trying to ensure a second date? Or develop a long-term relationship? First, let’s get you through the nerve-wracking first date. We’ve compiled 10 first date tips for both men and women, so let’s get started with choosing a first date activity.
There are 7.125 billion people on earth. If you’re looking for “the one”—as is your “one in a million” person, that gives you roughly seven thousand one hundred twenty-five people to choose from… and that’s if you prefer both sexes. So, divide that number by two and you’re given a little over 35,000 people to choose from.
That’s a lot, yet with these stats in your face, people are expect to choose only one person and spend the rest of their lives with them without at least wondering who else is out there? If this sounds crazy to you, you’re not alone. If these statistics fill you with confidence and reaffirms the choices you’ve made as correct, you’re also not alone.
Still, recognizing you’ve found the one person you want to spend your life with is a lot easier said than done. Then, what happens when the love goes awry or when someone better comes along? This might help.
How Do You Know You’ve Found The One?
A person should always have a list of prerequisites constantly open in their minds like an ongoing collaborative Google doc. It should list the attributes they wish to see in a person and a checklist of ways someone else should make you feel before committing to a relationship. At thesame time, that list cannot be too specific (i.e. black curly hair, one green eye and one blue one) because you’re setting yourself up for disappointment with such in-depth requirements.
You ever leave a date thinking, “Why didn’t I do that?” or “Why did I do that!”? I know I have, on multiple occasions. If right now you’re preparing for a date your brain is probably racing with all sorts of ideas and questions. I’ve been there, recently too. I get tempted to wish dating was easier. But the truth is I want dating to remain adventurous. I just need to plan ahead and prepare for it. Here are some first date tips and etiquette that you can always apply. Don’t be too cocky that you think you can just wing it. First impressions are important because you only get one shot.
Since I started dating I’ve gone on some wonderful first dates and some that I don’t recall because they were that horrible. The sad apart about the ones that went wrong is that I planned the date. If I was the conductor and the music didn’t flow then I can only blame myself. It might have gone different if I had Google to rely on back in the day. I didn’t’ though so I learned from my mistakes and others.
If you don’t know where to take her on a date and are looking for Date Ideas then be sure to check out my article